Inside the Mind of a Sloppy Firsts Girl!


Monday, January 7, 2008

Return of the Slam Book

If your not already familiar with the slam book then I suggest you go back and read a previous entry, What On Earth Was She Thinking. To recap: Back in September my friend Dasha decided, with all of her wisdom, to start a slam book. Despite Posie and myself trying to convince her otherwise.

I went back to school today (after a nice Christmas with my family and as I mentioned in the previous entry a not happy New Year.) as always I was super excited and completely ready for school to start up again after too much family time during the holidays.

The day was actually going amazingly well. At least until lunch time. After getting my food I headed over to the table my friends were already at. The closer I go to the table the more I noticed they were all huddled around something.

I set my tray down on the table, “Hello ladies. How’s your first day back from break?”

“You like school way too much, Tal,” Posie replied.

“Seriously,” Dasha added, “having to come back to school after having two weeks off totally blows. Any ordinary teenager would feel the same. You’re such a freak.”

“Yeah I know. What are we all looking at?” I asked.

“Don’t change the subject,” Katy barked.

“I didn’t, cause if there was no subject to begin with could I actually change it?”

“Don’t get smart with me.”

“Too late.”

She glared at me for a second, “But anyway, what happened with that hottie on New Years Eve?”

“No Katy, I don’t want to talk about that. I just want to forget about New Years and move on. Now what’s so interesting at our lovely little table, besides me?”

The look on Dasha’s face was like a little girl who got caught with her hand in the cookie jar. “I got my slam book back.”

I groaned, “I do not want to be a part of slam book talk.”

“Don’t be such a buzz kill,” Posie interjected. “It’s actually pretty funny. There are some mean things about me in it, but I’m bigger than that. It’s hilarious reading what everyone thinks of people in school. I know you could care less what others think about you, but aren’t you at least curious as to what others are saying?”

Well after everything I gave in and read through the slam book. Here are a few things I learned:

-The perfect little bitch!
-With a body that amazing she’s either anorexic or bulimic. (There’s no way she’s either.)
-There’s only one reason Carter still goes out with her, SEX. (Yet I’m not positive that’s true. Even though apparently the whole school thinks so.)
-I know she’s only 16 but do you think her boobs are real? (Of course they are.)

-One word, SLUT!!!
-Honestly, was she even a teenager the first time she had sex? (I think 13, but still that’s way too young.)
-She’s so pretty though she could have any boy in school. Or any boy for that matter. (This was in response to the previous 2 and others like it.)
-(And to counter the above one.) She can have any guy she wants cause she’ll sleep with them!

-The only reason little miss chubby is popular is because the princess’ daddy is super rich. (Comments like this made Dasha so mad cause she’s a little sensitive about her weight.)
-If her father wasn’t loaded she wouldn’t even have friends. (I’d still be her friend. Hopefully so would Katy and Posie.)
-I’m surprised and not surprised she doesn’t have a boyfriend. Surprised because boys like rich girls and not cause she’s kind of fat.
-Does she even have a brain inside that head of hers.
-It’s probably just filled with sawdust.

Talbot (Me):
-There is such a thing as too smart. (It was meant as a dis but I look at it as a compliment.)
-If she’d put even a little effort into how she looks she’d have her pick of guys. But the freaks too busy being an outcast. She needs to get a life.
-Can you say fashion disaster.
-She probably gets dressed in the dark.
-Have you seen her older brother he’s totally gorgeous. (I’ll even admit it. He’s a very handsome man.)
(Now I saved the best one for last. There other ones were fairly easy to ignore, mostly cause they were basically true. I also saved this one till last because it’s a horrendous lie. No truth to it what so ever. Yet it’s the one people like the most.)
-Does anyone else think it’s a little weird that her brother is 20 years older then her.
-Have you seen how much they look alike
-Her brother? Have you seen the way they act together? He’s more like
her father.
-You sure he’s not?

What the hell goes on in peoples heads. Of course he’s my brother. If he was my father I think I’d know. He’s my older brother and that’s all there is to it.

As I said before about the slam book in my previous entry, slam books are the root of all evil. (And now I have the proof that this is true.)


DeusExMachina said...

I never experienced a Slam Book when I was in school but after reading the type of comments you put out I can see their not the greatest ideas. As much as I would love to know what everyone anonymously thought about me, I know that if the comments weren't great I would take them badly.

The bits about your brother? Pfft! Just laugh it off, its just teenage imaginations picking out anything they can to criticize. The more inventive they are the funnier they probably think their being. Its a load of nonsence!

As for being 'too smart', no such thing, as you said take it as a compliment, in the next few years you will be higher then the rest could ever dream of being!

Nice blog, my second read (first was of the new year post)
I will defiantly watch out for yours in future

Earric said...

What you'll learn about High School is that people are mean to each other just because they can be. Hence, the slam book, because it is an anonymous way to spread nasty little rumors about people. They don't realize the damage they can cause to others.

Niro said...

Very nice Have to read it soon...
nice blog,nice to see you in blogger group too.. Hmmm if you have time give me your comments too visiting mine

bRaT said...

what they said about your brother was actually pretty darn stupid... but hey, whatever rocks their boat right...

be mean in high school, and you can be pretty damn sure it's going to come around and bite you... and i wouldn't call that karma... i would put it down to plain ignorance.. they'll have grown into this mean little shell of theirs, and won't be able to stop... until they're responsible for something terrible...

sorry... i chose to be the outcast at school... so if that's what you're doing, and are happy doing it... i get where you're coming from, and you couldn't possibly be heading in a better direction...

Elise said...

I never had a Slam Book when I was in School either. It seems a little mean. Teenagers are really sensitive about themselves. Fueling it is just asking for trouble. Its a little cowardly. Anonymously wrting nasty things...

I did a truth game with my housemates at uni once though. We sat around for ages saying good things and bad things to each other. We all ended up getting drunk and crying.


thoughtsforapenny said...

High school is always drama. You don't seem to let it get to you, which is good. I commend you for that becuase Lord knows, when I was never able to turn the other cheek. I was always concerned of what others thought and now I realize how pointless that is. Why care? It's your life and they don't have to live it.

About the Slam Book, I don't really know what to think. I never even heard of one. I think it's terrible how people can be so mean.

Mystery Woman said...

Slam Books? Well I've heard of 'em but never had the pleasure of sneaking a peek at one until now... I'd say big deal. If people are taking the time to write about're hot stuff baby cakes!

Joe Sorry said...

hey, love what you are doing with this blog!

Psychotic Little Thing said...

Wow. You're going to hate me for saying this, but American high schools are so interesting! Nothing like that ever happens here in England.

Not that I would want anything like that happening, ta. There are far too many bitchy people in my year probably desperate to write stuff like that about me, being an outcast, like yourself x]